For moments when you are afraid of death

cemetery during day

Writing has been nonexistent these days. I find myself in a whirlwind of transition and busyness. I can’t tell you how many topics I’ve rummaged through to present a reading to you today. Yet, nothing seemed to take. I found myself thumbing through old content and then I found an oldie that perfectly expresses the weight of anxiety that I feel in this current space. I hope it does your heart as good as it did mine as I revisited it.  ————— The idea of death is crippling. Last night, as I lay in bed, exhausted from the day, I was haunted by the lack of certainty in whether or not I would see the next day. I would feel my body relax, heading into a deep slumber, but I would jolt myself awake – afraid that my last breath may have been my last. See, there’s been this unbearable […]

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Why Can’t I Rest?

girl laying in grass

I’m scrambled. Laundry invades my personal space. My feet fail me in the minefield of toddler chaos dispersed across the floor. My body tells the story of the struggle with the dead weight of tantrums and self-neglect. I’m tired to say the least.  I started physical therapy last week for an impingement in my shoulder. The edges of my shoulders nearly met the tips of my ear lobes as my body seeks to guard itself against recurring pain. How am I to function in this space? And these are just the external things.  Internally, grief crouches at the door of my heart waiting to pounce at the most inconvenient moment as I attempt to move forward after my father’s passing. Internally, I can’t seem to settle my mind on just one thought. The pressure of life, the woes of death, the anxiety for what’s to come is a little too […]

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Holy Infant: Tender, Mild, Dependent


It’s that time of the year again – Sleigh bells are ringing, chestnuts are roasting by an open fire somewhere and the weather outside is frightful. Well, maybe the weather isn’t frightful for you depending on where you live, but you get the point. Anything below 70 is frightful to me. Nonetheless, grab your cup of hot chocolate or hot apple cider, snuggle up with your favorite chunky knit blanket and let’s talk about Jesus.  Around this time of year, some people get caught up in the logistics of when Christ was born, if you should have a tree or not or if it’s sinful to even say Merry Christmas, but let’s just focus on the fact that Christ was born!  One of the basics of Christianity is that we believe that Jesus was born both fully man and fully God. I don’t know about you, but, if we are […]

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What does it mean to live from faith to faith?

woman praising

There have been many things that have transpired in my life I could not control and would not have chosen for myself. Likewise, there are many things I have hopes for concerning my and my family’s future. With that, I’m sure I could draw on a lot of new age spiritism (which is actually old-age) and ideals of attracting goodwill towards my life by “being good” and by speaking my desires into existence. Actually, a lot of people I have heard use this language profess to know Christ. There’s this ideal that if I speak it enough, if I think happy thoughts, if I can just conjure up enough good energy, then I can produce the things that I desire in life. There’s this notion that I am so powerful that I can alter my future by just changing my thoughts to be happy and positive. Some call it the […]

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